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#21 Bassman

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Posted 25 June 2016 - 10:55 PM

What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?




Every morning you'll rise and shine! 
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I think I can - I know I can - I did
You're a post away to stay smoke free today.....
Quitting may not always easy, but it's always right...stay quit......
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My time of suffering is over, its the addictions time to suffer.......


#22 devo

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Posted 26 June 2016 - 01:38 AM

I’ve fallen in love with a pencil and we’re getting married.

I can’t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.
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#23 Lynn L

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Posted 26 June 2016 - 05:21 AM

I'm still waiting for the day that a fellow says if money was like snot, I'd blow it all on you! 

 

Or am I ???  hmmm........

 

I am so easily confused. 


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#24 devo

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Posted 26 June 2016 - 02:33 PM

Q: Which is the most curious letter?

A: Y?


                                

                                                               

                                                                                       1zzrf54.jpg  

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#25 Jillar

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Posted 26 June 2016 - 03:19 PM

Lol those are some funny jokes!
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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#26 Bassman

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Posted 26 June 2016 - 07:01 PM

Lol those are some funny jokes!

...

They are...you should start a new post each Friday getting it going for the weekend....
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<p>image.png?base_img=3&size=0&date_yr=2014

Link to all my nosmoking songs for QSMB:
http://www.youtube.c...=pathagawarts54
+2j3342d.jpg

I think I can - I know I can - I did
You're a post away to stay smoke free today.....
Quitting may not always easy, but it's always right...stay quit......
I gave myself the gift of quitting, I will not take that gift away from myself.......
My time of suffering is over, its the addictions time to suffer.......


#27 Jillar

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:31 PM

A giggle to start our weekend :)


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1zzrf54.jpg

 


 

Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#28 Hope2Nope

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:36 PM

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

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#29 Jillar

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:42 PM

:laughbounce: 

 

Ok. DISCLAIMER THIS JOKE I'M ABOUT TO TELL MAY BE OFENSIVE  BUT IT SURE IS FUNNY. Mods Let me know if I'm out of line please :)

 

 

Why don't little girls fart?

 

Because they don't have assholes until they're married!  :laughbounce: 


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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#30 Hope2Nope

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:48 PM

My son asked me what it's like to be married so I told him to leave me alone and when he did I asked him why he was ignoring me.

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#31 Hope2Nope

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:50 PM

Every time you talk to your wife, your mind should remember that... 'This conversation will be recorded for Training and Quality purpose'

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#32 Jillar

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 07:50 PM

 

My son asked me what it's like to be married so I told him to leave me alone and when he did I asked him why he was ignoring me.

 

 

Yea, it's exactly like that!  :laughbounce: 


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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#33 JimHannoonen

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Posted 23 June 2017 - 08:24 PM

So this dyslexic walks into a bra.....


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"We don’t slip into our greatest achievements. We commit and then make them happen."


#34 Lin-quitting

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Posted 24 June 2017 - 01:15 AM

Horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks "why the long face?"


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                  "I didn't come this far to only come this far."

 

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I want my life back. I WANT MY LIFE BACK!

There is no try, there is only do. Failure is not an option.

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#35 giveintowin

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Posted 24 June 2017 - 02:14 AM

How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?

 

None. The light bulb has to want to change itself.


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Quit date Thursday 24th October. 2017, 10.10am AEDT.

 

It is a relief to not be killing myself slowly. Every day I don't smoke I am getting stronger.


#36 andyc941

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Posted 30 June 2017 - 12:08 PM

Bump for a Friday


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#37 beazel

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Posted 30 June 2017 - 01:18 PM

Why do bicycles fall over?

 

Because they are two-tired.


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2iijyuf.pngYoung Pharte     

 

QSMB - "The Wind Beneath My Wings"

image.png?base_img=6&size=0&date_yr=2017 loveshower.gif

 on the other side of fear lies freedom

 

In the world of addiction, we leave "normal" behind.  - Mike Piano  

Would be a shame for a second's weakness to undo all this hard work. - sgraye

Life's too short, don't make it shorter. - Jess 

 

                                                       

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                      

 

 

 


#38 Jillar

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Posted 30 June 2017 - 05:21 PM

A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?" The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation."   :laughbounce: 


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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#39 Jillar

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Posted 30 June 2017 - 05:55 PM

A little boy and his grandpa are out fishing. The little boy says to his grandpa "hey grandpa, can you talk like a frog?". And the grandpa says "why sure I can!" The little boy claps his hands and says "that's GREAT cause my dad said as soon as you croak, we get to go to Disneyland!"   :laughbounce: 


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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#40 Hope2Nope

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Posted 30 June 2017 - 05:58 PM

Q. Why did god create Adam before he created eve?
A. Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.

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