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A tale of two husbands...which will you be?


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#1 Nancy.

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:34 PM

Ollie and I were talking, and realized our husbands are the same age, 66.  That is about the only thing they have in common.  I am going to tell you first about my husband, Dennis, and then Ollie will be along to tell you about Tony. Hopefully there are smokers who will read this who still have the opportunity to choose which husband and father they would like to be.

 

Dennis is a never smoker.  At 66, he still works 40 hours a week.  He enjoys golf, and boating.  He maintains our home and houseboat.  As many of you know, this past year he and his 70 year old brother totally remodeled the upstairs of our home. They took the kitchen down to the studs and rebuilt (and Dennis was still working 40 hours each week).  Dennis recently walked his oldest daughter down the aisle with pride.  He loves life and has a wonderful laugh.  He takes medicine to control blood pressure and cholesterol, but is in great health otherwise.

 

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Nancy

 

 

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#2 ollie

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:35 PM

I carnt post pictures, but I'm sure Tony would not want you all to see how sick he looks...
Tony has end stage emphysema... He smoked until he physically couldn't put a cigarette in his mouth and smoke it..
It takes all the strength and breath he has ..to just get out of bed in the morning...with my help...
After a rest...he needs my help to wash...shave..
Chair lift gets him downstairs...gets settled in a chair..where he stays till we have a bedtime routine.
Emergency ambulances ,and hospital is never too far away...lung infections are almost on going..
Doctors fight to keep pneumonia at bay...
Because his blood doesn't retain oxygen...he needs a machine 16 hours a day....
Sleeping with the mask on and the machine going all night is only half of it...
Tony relies on me for everything...as sooon as he tries to move ...he is breathless...
I have watched him the last 14 years slowly get worse ,this is a very cruel illness.
I have shortened this thread...I could write a book...
Tony and I don't know just how bad this will get...we live our lives on a daily basis..
If you are out there reading this...wanting to quit...please do it now..
I thank Nancy ....brilliant idea.. 


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#3 Jeni

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:38 PM

xoxo to both of my dear friends, Nancy and Ollie...

I am so glad that Dennis is so vital, Nancy! And that you have such a beautiful quit to be able to enjoy the rest of your lives together.
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#4 AprilKTQ

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:38 PM

Wow this was a beautiful idea ladies


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#5 Jeni

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:41 PM

I carnt post pictures, but I'm sure Tony would not want you all to see how sick he looks...Tony has end stage emphysema... He smoked until he physically couldn't put a cigarette in his mouth and smoke it..It takes all the strength and breath he has ..to just get out of bed in the morning...with my help...After a rest...he needs my help to wash...shave..Chair lift gets him downstairs...gets settled in a chair..where he stays till we have a bedtime routine.Emergency ambulances ,and hospital is never too far away...lung infections are almost on going..Doctors fight to keep pneumonia at bay...Because his blood doesn't retain oxygen...he needs a machine 16 hours a day....Sleeping with the mask on and the machine going all night is only half of it...Tony relies on me for everything...as sooon as he tries to move ...he is breathless...I have watched him the last 14 years slowly get worse ,this is a very cruel illness.I have shortened this thread...I could write a book...Tony and I don't know just how bad this will get...we live our lives on a daily basis..If you are out there reading this...wanting to quit...please do it now..I thank Nancy ....brilliant idea.. 


Doreen...

I posted in this thread before I saw your post about Tony.

Though I knew of your situation, I wasn't aware of all the specifics.

God bless you for the care you give your husband.

Please always make sure to take some time for YOU.

Love you, my friend.
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#6 MissyCat

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:46 PM

Brilliant and powerful ladies!
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#7 seeking_freedom

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 09:53 PM

Thank you ladies for taking the time to post on this thread. It really is a message for all of us.


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#8 onthemark

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 10:01 PM

Yes, a beautiful and heart rending thread.


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#9 Frank

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Posted 30 December 2015 - 10:41 PM

Speechless !  New quitters, you still can live a full life, quit and stay quit. This world has a different colour  once you leave the addiction behind.


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Nov 6, 2011 I decided " I had enough with this sh*t "

I quit because I just got tired of the life under a rock, dark and with not enough air to breathe waiting for the day to get crushed!

Alcohol to a quit is like Kryptonite to Superman

Stop, Think and then React. Not React,Stop and then Think

Practice does not make it perfect, makes it permanent. Practice the right things!

Quitting is by far the best decision for the rest of your life.

If a Doctor gives you 6 months to live, would you start living after the first three? Quit now!

" I am a puff away form a pack a day"

Once you stop puffing or having Nicotine in any form, then and only then your symptoms will stop.

I quit with a frozen turkey. Once I felt comfortable with my quit,  I ate it.

Life is such a good teacher, that if you don't learn the lesson it will repeat it to you.

 

 

 


#10 marciem

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 12:13 AM

Thank you ladies both of you for sharing... what a comparison to show new quitters!!

 

Ollie, I "liked" yours not because it is a nice story but because I so much appreciate you sharing your life and Tony's with us in this way.


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Quit Date 9/20/12
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Better to be a nonsmoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to quit.
Remember: everything bad about quitting is temporary, and everything good about quitting is permanent. TimidTulip
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#11 fonza60

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 12:43 AM

This is very true story. Smokers wake up the suffering from withdrawals is far les then what Ollie is going through. My grandmother my aunt died from infasiema my grandfather died from a stroke all heavy smokers. Meanwhile I continued to smoke while my aunt telling me to stop before its to late.She like most smokers feel no affects for years and ignore the early warning signs until they start waking up at night not beaning able to breath. Theirs nothing worst then not be able to breath. Then it progresses to day and night. I did that ignored the warning signs until I came down with a bought of bronchitis then every year for three years I came down with it.Wheezing coughing for weeks then it would go away. the third year it lasted for two months. Two months of coughing wheezing feeling at night I might have to go to the emergency room because I couldn't get a full breath of air scary stuff.My wife would say are you crazy wake up quit the cigarettes everyone knows that cigarette's kill. I was so addicted I wasn't listening to her I couldn't imagine going without with my coffee or beer I was the odd person going off to smoke at family events or most activities because I refused to believe that the ill affects of long term smoking would affect me.Will they did after my last bought with bronchitis I quit wheezing went away coughing went away I can take deep breaths I can go to bed and not worry I smell good I can take long walks and not get winded its wonderful.My message is do what ever it takes don't wait until you get sick it will happen, Smoking kills its a fact believe it.


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#12 gonfishn21

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 01:47 AM

Wow.
This is one of the most powerful posts I have seen.
I am praying I quit soon enough., and feel so bad for
someone I have never met. I am so sorry.
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Smoking is no longer an option for me. I no longer smoke. Smoking is just something that I used to do
.

Smoking is not treatment. Smoking is the cause.

The usual outcome is only that, because you let it be. The "quitter's" outcome is because we "make it be".

Beat the urge, and the urge will stop beating you.

#13 Smokefreetoday

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 03:07 AM

Such a powerful set of posts. Thank-you Ollie and Nancy.


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#14 Guest_jazzyjan_*

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 03:48 AM

I am without words except to say what a powerful post. Thank you for sharing this.
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#15 Enrik

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 03:59 AM

Very touching post, Ladies!
Thanks for sharing it.
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JUST DO IT~~10/31/2015
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#16 REZ

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 01:48 PM

Powerful post just like you two!


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#17 ^Shell^

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 02:00 PM

Although the story is so sad and heartbreaking....please, to those who are on the fence or have fear about quitting smoking, take this story to heart. It's hard to imagine struggling for each and every breath. When these people sneeze or have a cough, it's painful and very frightening.


Join this board and get real about quitting. One cigarette is too many and 10000 is not enough.

Take the rope and let's really take in Tony's life and suffering into our own. Make his life mean something to you.

Tony , may God be with you, honey ((hugs))

NOPE !
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#18 KimJ

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 02:28 PM

After i reread my post, it didn't add any value so i deleted


Edited by KimJ, 06 March 2016 - 02:10 PM.

A crave passes whether you smoke or not!
GOTTA STAY QUIT!!!!

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#19 KimJ

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 02:31 PM

Ladies, this is powerful.Thanks for your courage to post it.

 

To the current smokers thinking about quitting who are reading this, many have quit smoking and so can you. On the other hand, so many had died from it and so can you. The choice is yours to make.


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A crave passes whether you smoke or not!
GOTTA STAY QUIT!!!!

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#20 WaterdownGirl

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Posted 31 December 2015 - 02:34 PM

I can't even begin to imagine. 

 

Thank goodness my mom and I have both quit smoking. 

 

I feel like I was reading one of those "ghost of Christmas future" things.  I have no doubt my mom and I would have been Tony.


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