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#3241 Lin-quitting

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Posted 11 January 2018 - 01:57 AM

Sending good vibes up into the universe that the person I know as Autumn, whom I have come to care about here on QSMB, finds peace and better personal vibes. She quit smoking and has been clean of it for over a year, and that makes her one hell of an amazing human, no matter what else she struggles with.

 

Thinking of you sweetie.


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#3242 jordan7

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Posted 11 January 2018 - 02:36 AM

Well, I spent Dec 29th-Jan 2nd in a mental institution. Manager guy rejected me, long time guy is in the process of rejecting me no matter what I do for him and us, and the job is still going well except they keep wanting to promote me when I'm not mentally prepared for it.

 

Buttttttttttttt that was not a sad poem. The end is supposed to be the realization that true comfort from life comes from comfort in the unknown, rather than stressing over needing answers for things that will never be fair or balanced. It's sad because my head is a sad place, I guess, but the message is a good one. :P

 

Autumn, wasn't manager guy already in a relationship with someone else, and hasn't your relationship with long-term guy been toxic for at least as long as you've been posting here?  You've conquered many of your demons/addictions over the last few years, so why not continue the good work and make 2018 the year you start to accept yourself (and to be honest with yourself about the good, the bad, and all the in-betweens), and leave behind any relationships which bring you down and keep you from moving forward.   Congratulations on doing so well in your job despite all the obstacles.  That's a big thing, and something you can use to build your confidence.  Wishing you the best.


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#3243 Autumn

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Posted 11 January 2018 - 04:15 AM

Oh Autumn I truly hope that one day you can learn to love yourself and see what a beautiful and intelligent young woman you are. I'm sorry for your setback but hope it helped you :bigarmhug:

 

Oh, I definitely needed the mental hospital, and it helped me so much in a short time. I really needed the intensive care. I'd been begging my therapist for months to put me on an IOP (intensive outpatient) schedule, but she just kept shrugging it off or suggesting I go to the hospital... so I finally went. I talked to so many people I could relate to, and, in specific, one really great counselor who I feel has actually changed my life a little with the communications lesson she taught one of the days she was there. I'm thankful for the time I spent there. I honestly wish I could've stayed longer, but I didn't want to take too much time off of work. They were generous to give me the personal leave at the last second and not hold it against me in any way, so returning to work as soon as possible was my thank you.


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#3244 Autumn

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Posted 11 January 2018 - 04:29 AM

Sending good vibes up into the universe that the person I know as Autumn, whom I have come to care about here on QSMB, finds peace and better personal vibes. She quit smoking and has been clean of it for over a year, and that makes her one hell of an amazing human, no matter what else she struggles with.

 

Thinking of you sweetie.

 

Thank you so much, dear. This post touched me and made me feel so loved. :bigarmhug:

 

Autumn, wasn't manager guy already in a relationship with someone else, and hasn't your relationship with long-term guy been toxic for at least as long as you've been posting here?  You've conquered many of your demons/addictions over the last few years, so why not continue the good work and make 2018 the year you start to accept yourself (and to be honest with yourself about the good, the bad, and all the in-betweens), and leave behind any relationships which bring you down and keep you from moving forward.   Congratulations on doing so well in your job despite all the obstacles.  That's a big thing, and something you can use to build your confidence.  Wishing you the best.

 

Yeah, he was. It was a complicated situation. Basically, someone revealed to me in confidence that he was in an open relationship with his girlfriend. I, also, happened to be in an open relationship (and also single at times, long-term guy and I used to break up A LOT). I was never really serious-serious about manager guy, he's just a hottie with a brain that I was hoping to get to know a little better and, maybe, if lucky, get to know a lot better a couple of times. ;) hahah I definitely still have a huge, stupid schoolgirl crush on my hottie manager, but be it that he's made no obvious indications to me that the feeling is mutual over a very long span of time, I just ride the high he gives me when he's around and leave it at that. Maybe he was never in an open relationship. Maybe he's trying really hard to be more professional. Him and I used to flirt a lot, now it's kindof hushed. His job has been kindof on the line lately, not for anything related to that at all, but I think he's trying to be more serious right now and I respect that 100%. It still sucks. He is TOO EFFING CUTE but que sera sera.

 

As for long-term guy and I, we've actually made some significant changes in our relationship. One of those being, instead of breaking up every fight, we really have long talks and put off any impulsive decisions. We've also been having more productive conversations, and less fights. He has been vastly more supportive. He still has a lot to work on, and so do I, but I haven't given up on him yet. We had a very toxic relationship, and it's still toxic, but it's getting better. I don't believe him to be a toxic person. We're just two people who both have a whole lot of baggage doing our best. I really value how despite all of our adversity and friction, he stays by my side and I stay by his. I may leave him in the future, absolutely. I have not crossed the thought out of my mind. But right now we are in the middle of some very exciting, big-time progress in how we talk to and treat each other, and I really want to see where it goes before we decide there's no hope.

 

The job thing is great but way too scary. I just got out of the mental hospital, after all. The last thing I need right now is a ton more stress. But, I am flattered that they have so much confidence in me, and I think I'm going to work on getting cross-trained a bit more so that the next time a promotion is available, I will have the confidence to apply and really go for it.

 

Thank you for such a thoughtful response, and I hope all is well on your end. <3


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#3245 Andoo

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Posted 11 January 2018 - 06:41 AM

You will be fine, it is probably just a old smoking trigger.

 

Being in a plane for hours, and not being able to get to smoke.

 

Bleah !!!!

Funny I never felt like a smoke when flying, I just knew I couldn't smoke and it never bothered me, even on long haul flights. But when I exited the plane the first thing was to find the smoking room lol. Awful places those



#3246 marciem

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Posted 13 January 2018 - 07:47 PM

Thank you so much, dear. This post touched me and made me feel so loved. :bigarmhug:

 

 

Yeah, he was. It was a complicated situation. Basically, someone revealed to me in confidence that he was in an open relationship with his girlfriend. I, also, happened to be in an open relationship (and also single at times, long-term guy and I used to break up A LOT). I was never really serious-serious about manager guy, he's just a hottie with a brain that I was hoping to get to know a little better and, maybe, if lucky, get to know a lot better a couple of times. ;) hahah I definitely still have a huge, stupid schoolgirl crush on my hottie manager, but be it that he's made no obvious indications to me that the feeling is mutual over a very long span of time, I just ride the high he gives me when he's around and leave it at that. Maybe he was never in an open relationship. Maybe he's trying really hard to be more professional. Him and I used to flirt a lot, now it's kindof hushed. His job has been kindof on the line lately, not for anything related to that at all, but I think he's trying to be more serious right now and I respect that 100%. It still sucks. He is TOO EFFING CUTE but que sera sera.

 

As for long-term guy and I, we've actually made some significant changes in our relationship. One of those being, instead of breaking up every fight, we really have long talks and put off any impulsive decisions. We've also been having more productive conversations, and less fights. He has been vastly more supportive. He still has a lot to work on, and so do I, but I haven't given up on him yet. We had a very toxic relationship, and it's still toxic, but it's getting better. I don't believe him to be a toxic person. We're just two people who both have a whole lot of baggage doing our best. I really value how despite all of our adversity and friction, he stays by my side and I stay by his. I may leave him in the future, absolutely. I have not crossed the thought out of my mind. But right now we are in the middle of some very exciting, big-time progress in how we talk to and treat each other, and I really want to see where it goes before we decide there's no hope.

 

The job thing is great but way too scary. I just got out of the mental hospital, after all. The last thing I need right now is a ton more stress. But, I am flattered that they have so much confidence in me, and I think I'm going to work on getting cross-trained a bit more so that the next time a promotion is available, I will have the confidence to apply and really go for it.

 

Thank you for such a thoughtful response, and I hope all is well on your end. <3

It's wonderful to read how much you're progressing, (((Autumn)))!!

 

One commentary on the hottie manager guy... in today's climate, he needs to keep strict hands off any subordinates, even flirty eye contact these days can mean a trip to HR if someone spots it and thinks you are getting preferential treatment because of something beyond work, or if later down the line you get hurt and .... well read the headlines, you know the rest of the possibilities.  I'm just saying... I'm sure a lot of men/people in the workplaces are much more aware & wary of their actions toward subordinates lately (and yeah, about time IMO :) ).

 

It is great that you and Mr. Longterm are ironing out some kinks and maybe both growing into something more nurturing for both of you... that's what a good partnership should be and you hadn't had that in the past from what you've written.

 

Hugs and <3 to you!!


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Quit Date 9/20/12
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S.moking is N.ot an O.ption T.oday
Better to be a nonsmoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to quit.
Remember: everything bad about quitting is temporary, and everything good about quitting is permanent. TimidTulip
Not a day will ever go by that life is 100% perfect. But 100% of the days are better not smoking jwg
I feel no matter my outcome, quitting was still hands down the best thing I ever did....r.i.p. jwg 12/28/13
Like John, no matter my own outcome, quitting smoking is hands down the best thing I've ever done... mlm 2/16/17                                                       


#3247 beazel

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Posted 14 January 2018 - 07:51 PM

What does <3 mean????  I've seen it many times, at first I thought the poster just had 1 too many! Lol


2iijyuf.pngYoung Pharte     

 

QSMB - "The Wind Beneath My Wings"

image.png?base_img=6&size=0&date_yr=2017 loveshower.gif

 on the other side of fear lies freedom

 

In the world of addiction, we leave "normal" behind.  - Mike Piano  

Would be a shame for a second's weakness to undo all this hard work. - sgraye

Life's too short, don't make it shorter. - Jess 

 

                                                       

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                      

 

 

 


#3248 Joe7

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Posted 14 January 2018 - 08:56 PM

What does <3 mean????  I've seen it many times, at first I thought the poster just had 1 too many! Lol

 

It is a keyboard representation of a heart. 


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#3249 Jillar

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Posted 14 January 2018 - 09:27 PM

Thanks rozuki, I didn't know what it was either lol

image.png?base_img=5&size=0&date_yr=2016


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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#3250 Rozuki

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Posted 14 January 2018 - 09:33 PM

You are welcome, Jillar....but I already knew what <3 meant! Beazel asked the question and Joe7 gave Beazel the answer!  :wink:  Is it 5 o'clock yet? lol


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 Don't romance the cigarette. It's all a "pack of lies". ~ IQuit88


#3251 beazel

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 03:41 AM

It is a keyboard representation of a heart. 

Thanks Joe!!!!


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2iijyuf.pngYoung Pharte     

 

QSMB - "The Wind Beneath My Wings"

image.png?base_img=6&size=0&date_yr=2017 loveshower.gif

 on the other side of fear lies freedom

 

In the world of addiction, we leave "normal" behind.  - Mike Piano  

Would be a shame for a second's weakness to undo all this hard work. - sgraye

Life's too short, don't make it shorter. - Jess 

 

                                                       

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                      

 

 

 


#3252 Jillar

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 03:50 AM

You are welcome, Jillar....but I already knew what <3 meant! Beazel asked the question and Joe7 gave Beazel the answer!  :wink:  Is it 5 o'clock yet? lol


Lol, sorry to Joe! It has definitely been five o'clock here today :laughbounce:
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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.


#3253 Joe7

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 05:46 AM

No problem Jillar. I could have used some of that 5 o'clock here.
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#3254 Frank

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 03:18 PM

<3  I always thought that meant " going to sleep "  because it looked like a sideways butt.  :doh:


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Nov 6, 2011 I decided " I had enough with this sh*t "

I quit because I just got tired of the life under a rock, dark and with not enough air to breathe waiting for the day to get crushed!

Alcohol to a quit is like Kryptonite to Superman

Stop, Think and then React. Not React,Stop and then Think

Practice does not make it perfect, makes it permanent. Practice the right things!

Quitting is by far the best decision for the rest of your life.

If a Doctor gives you 6 months to live, would you start living after the first three? Quit now!

" I am a puff away form a pack a day"

Once you stop puffing or having Nicotine in any form, then and only then your symptoms will stop.

I quit with a frozen turkey. Once I felt comfortable with my quit,  I ate it.

Life is such a good teacher, that if you don't learn the lesson it will repeat it to you.

 

 

 


#3255 marciem

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 05:42 PM

<3  I always thought that meant " going to sleep "  because it looked like a sideways butt.  :doh:

:laughbounce:  :laughbounce:  :laughbounce:  :laughbounce:


Quit Date 9/20/12
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image.png?base_img=2&size=0&date_yr=2012
Honorary member of: 5a88dc8d35.png

S.moking is N.ot an O.ption T.oday
Better to be a nonsmoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to quit.
Remember: everything bad about quitting is temporary, and everything good about quitting is permanent. TimidTulip
Not a day will ever go by that life is 100% perfect. But 100% of the days are better not smoking jwg
I feel no matter my outcome, quitting was still hands down the best thing I ever did....r.i.p. jwg 12/28/13
Like John, no matter my own outcome, quitting smoking is hands down the best thing I've ever done... mlm 2/16/17                                                       


#3256 avian3

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Posted 15 January 2018 - 06:49 PM

You are welcome, Jillar....but I already knew what <3 meant! Beazel asked the question and Joe7 gave Beazel the answer!  :wink:  Is it 5 o'clock yet? lol

:laughbounce:


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#3257 notsmokin'jo

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Posted Today, 01:38 AM

I wonder if it really annoys non-Aussies when my posts consist of mainly yobbo/bogan talk but I just can't help myself, sometimes i just have to let my inner bogan run free or risk having her take over completely. 



#3258 marciem

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Posted Today, 01:46 AM

I wonder if it really annoys non-Aussies when my posts consist of mainly yobbo/bogan talk but I just can't help myself, sometimes i just have to let my inner bogan run free or risk having her take over completely. 

I'd prolly bug you to death for translations, if it weren't for wonderful Google who is taking over the world so I'm not sure how wonderful they are but beats the heck out of going to the library to look random stuff up like "bogan" :P :D   and "yabbo" and I wouldn't even know what section of the US library to look in :)  .  On the other hand, some things are a little misleading... One definition Google said is that yabbos are breasts... are you a breast? :) 


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Quit Date 9/20/12
event.png
image.png?base_img=2&size=0&date_yr=2012
Honorary member of: 5a88dc8d35.png

S.moking is N.ot an O.ption T.oday
Better to be a nonsmoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to quit.
Remember: everything bad about quitting is temporary, and everything good about quitting is permanent. TimidTulip
Not a day will ever go by that life is 100% perfect. But 100% of the days are better not smoking jwg
I feel no matter my outcome, quitting was still hands down the best thing I ever did....r.i.p. jwg 12/28/13
Like John, no matter my own outcome, quitting smoking is hands down the best thing I've ever done... mlm 2/16/17                                                       


#3259 notsmokin'jo

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Posted Today, 01:48 AM

Dunno if I'm a breast but I can be a bit of a B00b :shock: . But since I am a boardline yobbo and not a yabbo I should be safe.  :-?


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#3260 Jillar

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Posted Today, 01:51 AM

Dont have a clue what you're saying sometimes but it doesn't annoy me at all :)
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Things began to get better when I realized I would remain quit even if things never got any better.

Christian99 16 Years Quit

We say here that it is better to be a nonsmoker with the occasional desire to smoke than a smoker with the constant desire to quit. Marciem
Being successful doesn't mean that you'll never GET to smoke again. It means that you'll never HAVE to smoke again.





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