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#1 Poprini

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Posted 22 August 2012 - 11:29 PM

I often come across gems in your posts that I want to keep or pass onto others. Sometimes it's a reply to someone else which inspired me and sometimes it's just one line that made me think and would like to reflect on. I'm going to start collecting them here and I thank you for them.

Entries will be moved around from time to time...if I see themes emerging or want to put a few together in one post... :)


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Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#2 Poprini

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Posted 22 August 2012 - 11:30 PM

I have raised two children. So I have been around two different screaming babies...(little humans) and never once did I think they must want a cigarette. They were needing something... But a cigarette? Never. Now we are just like them screaming babies. Cept now we have to figure out just what it is our body's telling us it wants. But I can assure you...its not a cigarette, it never was.

 

--------

 

I had to realize that smoking was only going to make me feel better temporarily. Every cigarette I had just gave me a few minutes of temporary relief followed by a stronger desire for the next cigarette. For permanent relief, I needed to stop smoking and allow my body to readjust. I recently had a month, and I feel amazing. I never want to smoke again.

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#3 Poprini

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Posted 22 August 2012 - 11:32 PM

On being too comfortable in a quit:

A quit taken for granted is a recipe for failure

I dont think there is any such thing as a perfect quit
only a perfectly practiced one


On choices:


Sometimes now when I hear of people who have quit smoking but then for some reason decide to have a cigarette, I wonder if its really a desire to smoke, or more their lack of experience in making the right choice...

...And I sadly think, it’s not that any person wants to live their life this way, it’s just that they have made the wrong choice so many times in their life, it seems to become the right decision for when discomforts and stresses call their name. Quitting smoking is the act of not smoking, done through the practice of making the right choice, time and time again, through the good days and the bad, through the up times and the downs.


On quitting to live:

...its true...don’t quit to save your life...
Quit to spend it, spend it enjoying it, spend it learning new things. Spend it traveling, remember them big flying machines, you can get on one now. Spend it going to the movies to see a Disney movie with the youngest person you know...hell just go rent a kid if you have to. Be FUn, Be YOung BE ALiVe, Be YoU...BE Any thinG you wanna BE.

----

I never said to myself I want to quit smoking. I never said I want to live longer or die any differently then my father. I only said to my self “I want to live better before it's my time to expire”. I wanted to grasp the things my hands had never touched. I wanted again to know the awe and possibilities of life that made my heart beat when I was just a child. I wanted to feel like there was a reason to get up tomorrow. So I had to make a choice; lock my dreams away in a chest of steel so they may never haunt me, reminding me of my cowardness. Or stand tall and declare my life worthy of living. To fight any foe or obstacle that may stand in my way of seeing my dreams come true.

Of the two I chose the latter. But it was not out of bravery, rather I was to afraid to die the coward that never had the guts to end his own submission.


On negative reactions from others:

To quit smoking is like leaving your best friend back in that small town you both swore one day to leave. But now when the time comes only one has the courage to pack their bags, saying goodbye to all they once knew, with only the hope that everything they ever really wanted is down the road. While our friends back home have some happiness, they're mostly filled with jealousy. Not only for being left behind, but for not having the courage to step into the blind...

Our smoking in many ways was an identity onto which the world hung their opinion. So in some sad and twisted way, when we quit smoking we have let them down.


On the futility of smoking:

Smoking cigarettes only makes you want another cigarette and then another
and another, so for me
I'd rather nail one foot to the floor and run around in circles all day.
Same thing as smoking a cig but you get some exercise.


On the benefits of quitting:

but you ask why quit?
think of it like this
smoking has consequences
not smoking has benefits

  • Lynn04, jenwalz, ChristaC and 4 others like this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#4 Poprini

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Posted 22 August 2012 - 11:33 PM

The people that come here, for the most part are here because they don’t want to smoke.

And then a lot of times all they hear in reply to a post or question is Don’t Smoke.

Well NO Schit Sherlock.

So it dawned on me today. We don’t need to tell these people “Don’t Smoke”, we need to reinforce their own reasons for why they choose to quit smoking – and we need to support the way they choose to quit smoking. This is their quit, not ours. Our personal beliefs weigh nothing in their mind and in their quit. We need to let them know, no matter the mood swings or their ever growing asses, their family loves and respects them. To remind them, although it is for themself they are quitting, it is all they love that will benefit. We need to remind them when their willpower is weak, that this is what they choose to do and that their reasons to quit were sound. In fact much sounder I am sure than their reasons for ever picking up the first cigarette.

...I have learned in my time quit, in living a life free of cigarettes and nicotine, there is so much more than living a life free of cigarettes and nicotine. It is not a game changer, it’s a ball field in another state.

 

__________

 

 

When we smoked we were a boob
when we quit we need support
But every bra don’t fit every boob

  • tizzie likes this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#5 Poprini

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Posted 23 August 2012 - 02:47 AM

Quitting smoking is not just about willpower (or won't power) because it's not just a habit - it's an addiction.

For me, it helps to understand why I think and feel the way I do when not smoking seems harder than smoking.

Craving does not equal smoking. If my inner junkie starts whining at me then I listen - no use trying to deny how I'm feeling, the junkie just shouts louder.

So I have to respond: "OK, I'm wanting to smoke right now. Why is that? - what am I doing, what time of day it is, what's happening/stress factors, who am I with, etc." There is usually an explanation for why the craving is happening at that particular time. Once I recognise that, I can reason it out - for example, if it's stress, then whatever has happened isn't going to change if I smoke - particularly difficult work colleague will still be a pain in the arse. If it's because I'm with smoking friends - well, that always was my favourite relapse excuse: "I'm sat in a smoky environment anyway, what difference will it make if I smoke *just* while I'm here". All the difference in the world. Did you know that you have to be in a smoky environment for 100 hours solid before you have taken in the same amount of nicotine from passive smoking as a smoker gets from just one cigarette? OK, so you're still breathing in the eleventy-billion other toxins in tobacco smoke, but at least you're not feeding your addiction if you're not smoking yourself.

Sometimes, if I really can't put my finger on the reason for the craving - I'm cold turkey, so I'm physically nicotine free - or if reason doesn't work, then I just tell my inner junkie quite firmly to STFU, because I have decided that I am not going to smoke, because I'm not going through early withdrawal all over again.

It's not harder for you than it is for any of the rest of us - look at some of the people on here who smoked 40+ cigarettes per day for decades then quit. Look at some of the people on here who are still living with smokers or spending time with smoking friends and relatives.

Unless your friends and relatives are the kind of people who tie you to a chair and put a cigarette between your lips and light it for you, then it's always your choice as to whether you smoke or not.

It's not easy to quit - but it is simple. All you have to do is not smoke.


Original post http://www.quitsmoki...t=44064#p493000 The whole thread has got great stuff in it.
  • tizzie likes this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#6 Poprini

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Posted 23 August 2012 - 02:58 AM

This is hard because there are so many people here who have helped me and spent their precious time talking me through things, but I do not want to be a fraud or a liar so I am going to be honest. I blew it today. I am reevaluating where I want to be right now. Do I jump right back on the horse or do I take some time and try again when the pain isn't so fresh from this last quit. I don't know the answer yet...

 

I respect your honesty. We are here to quit, not to please the board. I am glad to see that you recognize that.

I relapsed a little over a month ago after having 4 months. I smoked half a pack, and got right back on the train.
The next few days I did struggle with cravings, but I did not experience physical withdrawal. If you make the choice to get back on the quit, very very soon, you can save yourself the pain of a full blown acute withdrawal.

You have probably re awoken the beast, so I would expect cravings to follow, but you should have very mild withdrawal.

What I feared when I relapsed was that if I slept on it, I would have made the wrong choice. I mean, it is a decision process in which the junkie thinking has tremendous voice, being as you just smoked, and the cravings will be strong. There is a saying, you can't fix a broken table with a broken hammer. Even when quit the junkie thinking affects us. Imagine what happens when we have reintroduced the drug!

Something to consider: you may not be in the best mind to make such an important choice. The longer you delay the decision to start smoking again, the more clearly you will think about it.


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Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#7 Poprini

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Posted 23 August 2012 - 03:05 AM

Cigarettes were my friend once....and truth be told i didn't want to give up smoking! I enjoyed it! It was my relaxing time.....I always knew they were bad for me, and some day they may even kill me....but i enjoyed them so i turned a blind eye to the danger :?

I was told it was time to give up by the doctors :( So off i went into my quit with a huge mountain to climb, as i was giving up something that i loved so much. I didn't know how i was going to do it.... and thought a lot of people had an advantage over me....They actually wanted to quit! :(

I knew it wasn't going to be easy but i also knew it was the right thing to do. I went through the early days kicking and screaming and sulking and slept most of the first week whilst sulking all the other time because i wanted my friend back :( The days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months.....and it wasn't until i got quite far into my quit that i realised i had been conned!!!! :evil:

It wasn't until after i broke free from the addiction i realised the cigarette's weren't my friend after all! The little shits had been conning me all along! I thought i wanted them, i thought they were my comfort, i thought i liked them.....but NO...thats what they wanted me to think! They wanted me to think that so i would never give them up!

Nicotine is evil! It makes you think that you want it, and you need it, and you can't live without it! But its all lies...You can live without it! and whats more you can live VERY VERY HAPPILY without it!

If the doctors told me now that they had made a mistake....that i can go back to smoking if i wanted to.....I can have my old friend back! I'd tell them NO CHANCE!!!!!!!! He isn't my friend, he never was! but I just couldn't see it until i was free from him!

Giving up smoking is one of the best thing you'll ever do in your life! :wink:


  • tizzie likes this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#8 lynn1957

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Posted 23 August 2012 - 12:36 PM

fantastic collection much appreciated
  • Poprini likes this
I opened my eyes on June 4, 2012.

#9 Garrett

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Posted 23 August 2012 - 05:19 PM

It wasn't until after i broke free from the addiction i realised the cigarette's weren't my friend after all! The little shits had been conning me all along! I thought i wanted them, i thought they were my comfort, i thought i liked them.....but NO...thats what they wanted me to think! They wanted me to think that so i would never give them up!


I can relate to this so much. I thought cigarettes made my day easier, they made it harder. I thought cigarettes gave me energy, but they took it from me. I thought cigarettes made me feel good, but I eventually hated that I smoked, and I thought I couldn't quit. I did quit, and I never want to go back to that cycle again. I'm so grateful that we are all here at this forum staying quit together, one day at a time.
I smoked my last cigarette on March 16, 2013.

#10 Poprini

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Posted 25 August 2012 - 06:25 AM

While I'm not the biggest fan of NRT, I am always interested in other thinking. This post really spoke to me:

I think NRT is helpful in that it's like wearing floatation devices when you are learning to swim. You will eventually have to throw away the floaties when you lose some of the fear and apprehension around quitting and you get used to the water. You then will have another stage of your quit when you are confronting the fear after you've learned to get comfortable with not smoking or when you get used to being in water. You will need to learn to float on your own and the hardest part at this stage is trusting that you will float. I think what some of the people here are trying to convey is that you do not need the floaties and you can float on your own but you just don't know it yet. They are suggesting that you need to confront the psychological aspect, the fear in order to quit. Sometimes by using floaties we reinforce the fear in that we are saying to someone you cannot float on your own. My advice is either with or without floaties jump in the water because you need to get to the river bank on the other side. It is greener, cleaner, kinder and there are less health predators there. Good luck. One way or the other do it. This is your quit. This is your life and your body. Do it for you.


Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#11 Poprini

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Posted 27 August 2012 - 01:16 AM

The single most important thing to remember is that sickarettes do not just jump into our mouths and light themselves. It requires a conscious decision on our part and a number of actions to make that happen. It is something you have complete control over. If you make the decision right now that you will not smoke under any condition, no matter what may happen, then all you have to remember is to keep that promise to yourself.

Don't let yourself be fooled into believing that the circumstances have to be perfect for you to keep your quit. You can and will keep your quit under any circumstances if that is what you are committed to. Don't doubt yourself; just go into this challenge knowing that you will not smoke and you will be fine.

 

Great stuff. Tim posted it to me when I was anxious about an upcoming stressful situation. I liked it so much I decided to turn it into a mantra:

I will not smoke under any circumstances, no matter what may happen. I do not doubt myself and go into any challenge knowing that I will not smoke and I will be fine.

Thanks again Tim. This thinking has been very important to my quit.
________________

On the same note but on a different day

It is very much a mind game. The only thing that I found that made it any easier to deal with was clarity that I would not smoke under any circumstances. Unfortunately, that wasn't a one-time decision, it was a decision I had to keep making for a long time. It's a tough journey, but it is well worth it.

  • tizzie likes this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#12 Poprini

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 08:53 AM

You can have a mundane excuse like smoking ban, a big cold, it's too cold, it's too expensive or you can have a long list of reasons. All can and do work.

You can pick a day or just start out of the blue. Both work.

You can read loads or just start or be told to start. All work.

But you have to have ATTITUDE, even if it is fragile. It does not matter.

I was a weak willed, spineless Jellyfish.....regarding smoking. You need attitude and perseverance over some time.

Attitude creates time. Time creates experience. Experience creates understanding. They feed each other.....until the process of quitting ends. This compartment is reintegrated into your life. Your mindset for most areas of your life stays the same during this process but you have changed. You applied tools to your addiction and kept doing it and doing it. You have changed an addiction. You will feel changed but you will still be the same.

------------

Problems with mindset.

I have a few problems with the term "mindset'. It seems to imply that the reasons for quitting smoking are all rational & logical. That doesn't make sense to me.

"You can't replace with logic what wasn't put there by logic in the first place".

We didn't start smoking due to logic so logic won't do the quitting.

I think there is an emotional element in there somewhere when we stop smoking. There is an element which is not accessible via words. Some sort of alchemy goes on with logic and emotion and plants itself deep in the mind then stopping is successful.

Maybe the wrong question is being asked. Instead of "why haven't you stopped" it could be "when you think of stopping which emotion seems to be the most unsettled". Or, "when you have stopped which emotion is the hardest to deal with". Exploring the emotions involved may help to access the subconscious.

------------

Some can't believe the first few days/weeks are so easy. They just thrive on it. They never thought it could be this way.

Others toil at the beginning. Most people. It is numbing physically and emotionally. Often you feel something is missing. Of course you may think it is smoking. It's as if someone is following you and you kinda would like to meet them. Weird....but they are not there but they are close. You feel it in your stomach.

The empty feeling is a good sign. You may lose something. A gap is created...but it gets filled later as you learn more.

Quitting is a learning process over time. Only you can go through it.

What is lost will be found and it starts to turn after a 3 or 4 months

The only dicipline required is to not smoke at all. You always keep this discipline but it changes from a discipline into a natural state of your being. "I don't smoke and i don't cross motorways".


Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#13 Merson

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 03:06 PM

This isn't fair Poperini......what about the one I did the other day........ :D

#14 Agent99

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 03:11 PM

This isn't fair Poperini......what about the one I did the other day........ :D



I was thinking the same thing Merson. We should work together to create the best post ever so we can get on this list!! :lol: :lol:

image.png?base_img=6&size=0&date_yr=2012

 

 4f8vpao0z.png

Bi_Girl_Cheerleaders.gifGo Quitters!!!

 

 

 


#15 Skittle

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 03:12 PM

This isn't fair Poperini......what about the one I did the other day........ :D



I was thinking the same thing Merson. We should work together to create the best post ever so we can get on this list!! :lol: :lol:

I'm with ya both........ I can't believe that there are no Skittles in this thread at all :shock: :?: :!: .... very puzzling, I can only assume Ms Poppa is saving the best til last ;)
:lol:

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You swam out from the boat and went down about 10 yards from the shore, you were nearly there! (Loudub)
......and the band played on!! (Breath)
Quit journey started July 5th 2012, relapsed but not giving up on giving up!!
Quit 8th May 2016

 

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#16 Guest__*

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 03:17 PM

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

It will be forever known as "The Skittles Effect" post.

I know it will be earth shattering and revolutionary.

I'm waiting with baited breath!!! :D

What does "baited breath" refer to anyway? hmmmmmmm

#17 kinkash

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 03:19 PM

Very nice Poperini.
When the student is ready...The teacher will appear-Soul
Fear of the quit is worse than the quit-Cookielinda
When you stop buying cig......You start paying for your addiction - jwg

Smoking is not some friend that brings you comfort. It is the Enemy that wants to kill you!
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#18 breath

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 04:12 PM

This forum is where I can be truly honest about what I did to myself as a smoker. The below list has never been seen in public because I was too ashamed. Too ashamed to reveal what I was prepared to put up with, what I was prepared to do. I'm not sure I've even admitted some of this stuff to myself. I'm crying hard as I type this but I have to face it.

I hate that:
My gums have prematurely receeded to the point where brushing my teeth is painful.
I'm terrified every time my gums hurt that I have developed mouth cancer.
I have destroyed my looks. My skin is blotchier and more lined than it should be at my age. I have spider veins on my face because my circulation is shot.
My feet and hands become extremely cold very quickly because my circulation is so bad. Sometimes I lose feeling in my feet.
I'm constantly terrified that I'm going to get gangrene.
Any ache, any pain, any skin irritation or discolouration, any cold, I'm sure that this is it - I've finally killed myself.
My son points out all the quit smoking ads, leaves me notes begging me to stop but then makes excuses for me - "It's ok Mummy, you can smoke today cause it's a special occasion, but not normally ok?"
I planned my suicide in the event of getting smoking related cancer because I felt I couldn't live with the shame of having brought the disease on myself or my family.

I hate that:
I lived every day with shame. The shame of being a mother who smoked - that I was prepared to risk my life and my son's future so I could smoke. The shame of being the smoking mother of an asthmatic child. I tried to tell myself it was OK because I never smoked around him. The shame of being so weak I could not say no. The shame I felt when people I respected came to realise I was a smoker and they looked at me differently. Because I hid it well. Lots of people didn't realise. I would carry spray on deodorant, tictacs and bottles of water everywhere I went so I could disguise the smell. I would hide from them, lie to them, make up excuses about why I had to leave early or duck out of the building and run back to the car for a moment. But at some point they would find out and I would feel shame.
In every conversation, dinner or meeting, I was always plotting my escape. When can I get away from these people so I can go and smoke? When can I get away from my son so I can go and smoke?

I want: (I am now)
To be truly present in a conversation, dinner, meeting or play date.
To be able to spend time with anybody without worrying that I won't be able to smoke around some people.
To be able to sleep on my back without coughing.
To laugh without coughing.
To get a cough without being terrified I'm going to see blood on the tissue.
To get some self respect back.

By Popperini

I added the bold words (I am now)

Very poignant post.
  • tizzie, Soozie and veronica824 like this

Relapse is like peeling an onion. TEARS!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it"
 
George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950}
 
NOPE stands for Not One Puff EVER....
 
It does not stand for......
 
Not One Puff EXCEPT...
 
The minimum requirement is maximum commitment....to NOPE
 
It takes many good decisions to make a good quit, and  only one bad one to lose it.

 

Quit 2nd October 2001.


#19 Poprini

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Posted 03 September 2012 - 11:23 PM

I was quit for almost 2 months before I joined this group. My husband smokes and all of my friends smoke too. I guess you could say they were all supportive and they told me how proud of me they all were all the while blowing smoke in my face. What do you do when going it alone? The exact same thing as when you join a group... You just tell yourself that you don't smoke, you don't like smoking, you are happy you don't have to smoke etc. and you keep telling yourself that over and over again until you believe it. And, you just don't ever take another puff! It is true that the longer you are quit the less you think about it. I can honestly say I can't even remember the last time I had a craving even. :D

---

Keep facing your triggers and craves and stay here and work an honest quit! Walk proud, and don't think any less of your old smoker friends, they are befuddled by someone who can actually "quit". They may feel threatened or are depressed themselves that they can't quit. They may "get it" one of these days, but right now they're only imprisoned by themselves. Not your concern right now, this is all about you and your quit! You are going to be completely changed, you have shed your skin and have got a new one... If your motivation is running low, there is your commitment to your quit. That is the single most important thing I to keep intact and undamaged is your promise to NOPE. NTAP, day by day... Have faith in yourself, dig yourself in and stay committed to NOPE. Everything else you are doing is the right thing and it all started when you quit! That was the magic moment. You're looking for your comfort zone and it will arrive, with some time and space and patience with yourself. Be kind to yourself most of all, it will all come together. When it does you may not realize it but one day it will hit you that you are extremely comfortable in your new skin, and you'll wonder how that happened.

---

You know what? What Marcus said about one day you wake up comfortable in your new skin and wonder how did that happen??? That is just so true!! At 3 months I had a hard time believing that would ever happen for me, maybe for others, but not for me. I was positive i would be one of those that suffered for eternity. Now here I am at 6 months quit and suddenly realizing, wow, I don't crave cigs! I don't even think about them unless someone around me is smoking, and even then I don't think to myself " I sure would like one of those" I really don't!!! It's a freaking miracle! So for all of you who are just beginning your quit or are struggling thinking it will never get better... It really, really does! So please just keep plugging along one day at a time. You will get there too! Take care and stay strong!


Full thread here: http://www.quitsmoki...php?f=2&t=45363
  • kinkash likes this

Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year


#20 Poprini

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Posted 06 September 2012 - 05:19 AM

Posted Image

Posted Image

Posted Image

Posted Image


Feed the addiction and it will stay. Starve it and it will leave.

 

Method: Educated Cold Turkey :: Quit 1 June 2012 :: My Journey: 1 day to 1 year





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